I've had it with my kid being ganged up on! Monkey has had at least one bully every year he's been in school, and this year it has gotten to the point of several kids ganging up on him. He's been telling me that four boys have been choking him, and punching him, and when he went to tell the teacher, they would block him and threaten him that they'd hurt him even worse if he told. AND bribing him! He said that one offered him a bakugan for not telling, another some other toy, and that's just ridiculous! He was to the point of not wanting to tell me because I wanted to know details to tell him principal.
Well, I can't just stand by, so I called his principal on Wednesday after work, and she called each of the four boys into her office. We thought the problem was solved, but on Thursday, five other boys were on him!
The story was that Monkey was digging a moat for their fort, when they decided they didn't want him to. One kicked snow in his face, and when Monkey went to tell the teacher, they all chased him and tried to jump on him. The first one missed, but the second one got him so they all dog piled on top of him. When they finally got off and Monkey was getting up, they took turns punching him in the back! Finally he got to the teacher and they had to stand on the wall. Hardly a severe enough punishment.
I marched him into the Principal's office to tell her what had happened and Matt got a call yesterday that they each had it marked on their permanent records, and had consequences at school. I hope this is the end of it and that things don't get worse because I'm standing up for my kid!
If I missed anything in the title, then sorry, but it has been a while again!
1. Work:
I have had a relatively consistent work load since getting that call October 19th-ish. I get at least two days of work a week, and have met a wonderful teacher who calls me in regularly. For professional, student safety, and privacy reasons I can't disclose any names or locations, but I really enjoy his grade 8s. They're a great bunch of kids who strive to achieve rather than slumping off their work! It's great!
2. Earrings:
Ms. Kanga has learned to take them out. This started in September, and wasn't really an issue. I'd just put them back in and we'd be fine. About a month ago, I believed she'd eaten one. I found her earringless and one chewed. I could not for the life of her find the other. I got some gloves, fed her plenty of prunes (which she eats like candy) and off we went. Several movements later I had still not found it and concluded she must not have eaten it, but mentioned it to the dr at her 18mos checkup anyway. We came home with an x-ray req and that night while changing Monkey's sheets I found the missing earring! YAY!
She still takes them out, but I now know she's not going to eat them, and more often than not she hands them to me. Sometimes I am missing a back, but for now she's wearing a cleaned up pair of my old studs that are quite difficult to take out. I'm looking into getting her some labret studs (flat back and screw on ball) so she can still have her pretties but I don't have to worry about her taking them out! ;)
Yule:
As many of you know, I am a practicing pagan of the Correllian Nativist Tradition. That being said, Yule is the time of year when we mark the changing of the seasons. The Old God Cerunous, passes into the dark, and the Mother Goddess gives birth to the Young God. For this reason, the colours of white (Maiden Goddess and birth) and red (Mother Goddess) are used to decorate the Yule tree and domicile.
I also purchased our first live Yule tree this year. Unfortunately it will not fit my master plan. I started out on a 10 year plan of purchasing one young potted Yule tree per year for 10 years (to start with). In the spring, the tree will be planted with the ashes of the previous year's Yule log to fertilize it. After 10 years, the tree should be of appropriate height to be harvested and light our home to repeat the cycle. Well, I didn't notice that the Alberta Spruce I bought was a dwarf. This means that it grows exceptionally slow (about 2"/year) and will never be more than 6". That might be tall enough if I can get under it right to the ground to harvest, but we will see! 2"x10yrs is 20" on top of the already 20" in height. That would not be a very tall tree! Anyway, I'll just have to get a proper sized tree in the spring to fertilize with the ashes from our Yule log, and buy a harvested full grown Yule tree for the first year!
As to our festivities, on Monday the 21st, we woke before the Sun to open gifts. The kids each got an activity tray, 3 neopets, and a movie/game. Monkey got Ratchet and Clank: Tools of Destruction, and Kanga got Dora Saves the Snow Princess. Then Monkey also got a Bilibo Pixel. It's a cube with interchangeable button like sides in six colours. This way, Monkey can make up as many games as he likes and it's all in a neatly (40% off) packaged sack. It also came with a few suggestions to get him started. As always there was also a book to go with it all! :) Kanga's other gifts were a stuffed lavender scented puppy, and a Crayola colour wonder Dora pad. The colour wonders are the markers that only colour on the colour wonder paper and nothing else. Great for little ones who want to use markers, but also enjoy colouring themselves! Matt gave me some jammie pants and an iTunes card, and I gave him a palm wallet and an iTunes care. Korbin gave me an "I love my mom" photo frame, and Matt a TimsCard (for TimBits!). We also had a family gift of Harry Potter Year 6 (gah! can't remember the name right now!).
After opening gifts (stockings included some mommy made chocolates so Monkey could eat them too), Monkey and I went out on the porch (as the Sun was rising) and said thank you to the Goddess for giving us back the God to warm the Earth again for Spring, and then it was off to Donna's! We hung out for the day (quietly as Rod was sleeping) and then had a pot luck dinner. I brought sweet potatoes...mmm!
4. Christmas:
Christmas Eve we headed over to Wayne and Olwyn/Papa and Nanny/Matt's parents to begin our Christmas traditions. Kanga was in a mood unfortunately, so she and I stayed back while the rest went to the Christmas Eve service. When they got back, we hung out, and chatted. Other years we put up the tree, but this year it was already done!
Christmas morning, we woke up Monkey, and the kids and Matt opened their stockings. After they let me sleep in a bit (Kanga does NOT sleep well in other places the 1st night) I got up and opened my stocking. Then it was breakfast cake time before digging into the tree. :) This year I made soap for every one. I made lavender, milk and honey, calendula tea tree, and aloe oatmeal. I found neat little boxes to put them in and wrapped them in tissue paper so they could keep drying. Soap is best aged at least 5 years, and optimal at 10 years. Home made soap is no different, but will last a lot longer as it doesn't have any chemical alterations other than the necessary soaponification of the olive oil. It seemed to go over well!
Monkey got some comfy jammies, reindeer book, and battle ship from Dad and Susan. A StarWars telescope and books galore from Nanny and Papa. Clothes galore, a toque from Roar of the Rings, and a dinosaur cart action player thingy from Mom and Ross. He was spoiled again and he loves it! He also got gifts from a few of my friends. :)
Kanga got some comfy jammies, a horse cart, and a soft bowling set from Dad and Susan. A dancing Dora and books galore from Nanny and Papa. Clothes galore, a toque from Roar of the Rings, and an baby surprise Cabbage Patch Kid (a baby girl!) from Mom and Ross. She too was spoiled and is loving her gifts, and she too got some things from my friends. :)
5. New Years:
HOME ONLY! :D We decided again this year to stay home and just chill out for New Years. Kanga stayed up until about 9, which is quite late for her, and the boys played Wii. I played Wii Frisbee golf with them but had to miss a few holes to take Kanga to bed. Matt did quite well for me! ;)
After that we put in Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone to begin our Harry Potter Marathon. We only got through the first two that night, so I watched four more yesterday.
Yesterday, the boys were playing Wii, or maybe Ratchet and Clank...I don't remember, but I told Monkey he needed to take a bathroom break, and halfway up the stairs he started crying! He's a tough kid, so I thought this was really weird and called Matt up. We had no idea, but when we couldn't settle him down stairs Matt decided to take him to the ER. Originally he was going to take him to University, but he decided to take him to Victoria just in case because they have the children's ER and facilities just in case. They left around 3:30pm, and while they were away, I got calls from mom and Wayne. I'm not one to announce anything before I know what's going on, plus I didn't want to worry anyone, so I didn't mention it.
On their way out the door, I told Matt to keep me up to date so I wouldn't worry to much. I didn't get any updates though! At 7:30pm when they finally got home, Matt told me that he'd forgotten his phone. It turned out that he likely had a tortioned testicle. A good thing we took him in. If it stays tortioned and undecended too long he'd need surgery to remove it. Luckily, on the way to the ultrasound, something in the way Matt was carrying him 'fixed' it. Monkey actually said to Matt "Dad! It's fixed!"
Like a good mommy, as soon as Kanga was in bed I headed outside to shovel the foot of snow off of our parking spot. Then I watched it, both waiting for the boys to get home, and making sure that my spot didn't get parked in! I hate it when I shovel my spot and others steal it! It happens too often, but not last night.
~*~*~*~
Well, I think that's it for now! Thank you so much everyone for all your generosity and hospitality. I had a great holiday, and hope you enjoy your soap! :)
Monkey has been having trouble socially at school from the beginning. Last February we considered taking him to team with his teacher, the principle, the learning support teacher, and the school psychologist to see what we could do to help him. This fall we started a communication book where he gets check marks if he's good, and x-es if he's bad. He only has to work toward two: listen, and play. He's been getting the listen check marks quite consistently, but the play are fairly spaced out.
Long story short, I've been thinkin of having him assessed for ADHD for a while. I've always sort of suspected that he may have ADHD as I see a lot of my own behaviours in him. That doesn't mean there's anything wrong with him, or that he is going to have a hard time in school. His teacher has said that he is very bright and that she has no concerns at all with his academics. He just has to touch. He needs to learn how to control his impulses to touch his friends. He's starting to get a reputation at school, and this makes me so sad!
Last year he hated school, but so far this year he likes it. I think it makes a huge difference that he's getting to spend more time with me too though. Last year we were out the door by 6:45am and I didn't see him until 12:30 at which point I drove him home, took him to the washroom and walked him to school. Then it was 6:00pm or later before I saw him again. While it was a great part-time job, it took me away from my child. By 7:00pm we were getting ready for bed, and the poor kid never got to see me. This year, I can walk him to school, hang out with him after lunch, and just get to know my kid again!
The assessment did show that Monkey has ADHD, so we're going to be eating the Feingold Diet. Dr. Feingold designed the diet in the 1970s to help kids with Autism, Asburgers, ADD, ADHD, bedwetting, and a variety of other issues. Basically we go back to eating like we would have 100 years ago when these disorders were unheard of. Stage one is no artificial flavours, no artificial colours, no BHA/BHT/TBHQ (preservtives), artificial sweeteners, salicylates. Stage two is
Calcium Propionate (CP), Corn Syrup (CS), Sulfite (SF), Sodium Benzoate (SB), Monosodium Glutamate (MSG/HVP), Nitrites/Nitrates (N), and Natural Smoke Flavor (SM).
Now I just have to figure out how to implement the program and we're off to the races!
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
I'm traumatized. Day went smoothly for Monkey though. I dropped him off, he had a great day at school and Matt picked him up right after class. Problem was he wasn't supposed to. He signed him out at the office like a good daddy, and said bye to Monkey's teacher.
I on the other hand, called the after school program at 3:45 to make sure that Monkey got to the program okay, and the worker told me he wasn't there and that he hadn't been Tuesday either. I'd left a message saying he started JK on Wednesday, so they should have known to go find him. I freaked out completely. I told the worker that she had better find my son. He's 4 years old. Where is he! Fighting tears and trying to figure out the next rational thing to do and keep on working with the kids and not freak them out, I decided to call his school and see if the secretary could page his teacher or if she knew anything.
I called the school, and said "It's Amanda Coughlin calling and my son Monkey was to start with the after school program today. He just started JK today and they don't know where he is. Do you have any idea where my son is." I said this as calmly as motherly possibly under the circumstances and frankly my voice sent chills down my spine. The secretary told me it's not her responsibility to know where my child is, and that I need to make arrangements for him. WELL POO HER! She then told me that Matt had picked him up. Why couldn't she tell me that in the first place! Granted I could have called Matt before the school, but I wasn't thinking about him being with his dad, I was thinking the school had my son, likely in his classroom, and the secretary could page the room to check! She also gave me heck for freaking out the workers. Well excuse me, but if my son is lost, they had better be freaking out. He's 4 and it's his first day of school!
Well, I'm angry again right now, and everything worked out fine. Yesterday, I told work I'd be late so I could make sure he got to program okay. I NEEDED that for my peace of mind. I've had 2 nightmares about him being lost since, and with it having been real to me so recently, it's not just the scary dreams, I wake up and run to his room to make sure he is really there. Traumatized! I'm telling you!
Well, another year has begun. I dropped Monkey off at school promptly at 8:45 and waited for school to begin. He met up with his buddies, played tag, got upset when they wanted to play cars, and then wound up playing cars anyway. He had is regular bit of crying when the teachers came because he had to stop playing, but lined up quickly just the same.
I went for a good long walk with two of the mums of his friends, and it was nice to have a walking buddy (or two). When I got home I went to run errands. That errand was the always exciting trip to Cheeky Monkey! I got Kanga some Retro BabyBanz sunglasses just like D's. I had hoped to find a pink, green, anything but black. There was also blue and white, but I don't like the look of white, and even baby blue would have folks saying what a cute baby boy I have! Kanga went potty at Cheeky Monkey and we headed back home.
I made it back in perfect time. Kanga was asleep in her carseat so we went to school with the buggy. Of course she woke up as we were arriving so I moved to a corner to wait for the kids and fed her. Most of the mums started coming around 11:25 and she'd eaten for about 10 min so she was happy again.
Anyway, Monkey had a great first day, as per his teacher's report, and off home we went to grab some lunch!
Day 2 was a little more stressful as the JKs started filtering in. Tuesday was just the SKs so there were only 5 or 6 of them there. Monkey got the whole class, mostly boys and a lot of Nov/Dec birthdays so still 3 years old, barking. His teacher was not amused so I had a chat with him about being a big brother and showing the other kids how to behave at school.
We're going to get a communication book going this year. We had talked about it last year and it just didn't get implemented. I wrote a note (today) letting his teacher know how we do things at home as she had asked for consistancy. At home we use a planner and I check off his chores, activities, etc as he does them. If he has more checks at the end of the week than x-es, then he gets a sticker. If he has a tempertantrum he get's a sad face on that day, and 5 min on the timer to cool down before we talk things through. I got him a school planner, and sounds like things are going to work out!
I'll keep you updated!
Many have been asking how our baby girl (aka Kanga) is doing, so I suppose I'd better join the 21st century of baby updates, and post a note once and a while! It'll still take me a while to get things up and going due to the growing SK boy (aka Monkey)! (Wow, SK already and next week at that! Yikes!)
